Perfectionism. The phrase that breaks or makes an individual try to achieve the highest of their sport. The dictionary states perfectionism because the ‘refusal to just accept any customary wanting perfection,’ whereas my definition of the phrase goes extra alongside the strains of a ‘stunning technique to hate life and ship your self to the grave early.’
And earlier than you inundate my inbox with hate mail, hear me out. I’m not saying those that determine themselves as perfectionists are ill-mannered or have the flawed intentions. What I’m saying is if you wish to succeed and get forward in life, perfectionism won’t get you there any sooner.
Striving for the perfect
Positive, an individual ought to and might try to have the perfect in life. Nonetheless, there’s a tremendous line between reaching one’s desired targets in life and failing miserably due to the unrealistic expectations one has set upon themselves with this ideology of ‘perfectionism.’ Nothing is ever good in life, and there’ll at all times be room for enchancment in every little thing we do, together with chasing success.
Willingness to succeed
An individual who seeks to need the perfect in life and to achieve their desired stage of success is one who’s motivated by the need to realize greatness. However, perfectionists are normally pushed by the worry of failure.
Worry of failure
By fearing to fail, an individual fails to reside. When an individual chooses to reside on this method, valuing themselves solely by their achievements, they set themselves up for even larger failures in life as an entire. The explanation for that is that the best way they worth themselves turns into intertwined with their stage of success. The second they don’t obtain the extent of perfectionism or success they search, they determine themselves as failures and open themselves as much as criticism. The unlucky factor right here is that the one who will probably be giving and receiving the criticism is nobody aside from themselves.
“Understanding the distinction between wholesome striving and perfectionism is vital to laying down the protect and choosing up your life. Analysis exhibits that perfectionism hampers success. In actual fact, it’s typically the trail to despair, nervousness, habit, and life paralysis.” — Brené Brown
Embrace your losses
Slightly than taking a look at methods to enhance their strategies or pathways to success, perfectionists wrestle with the idea of coping with and taking losses when issues don’t go their method, which frequently results in detrimental self-talk and the putting of pointless pressures on oneself. This isn’t solely unhealthy however a troublesome technique to reside, and after an extended interval of exposing oneself to such negativity, it will definitely takes a big toll on one’s emotional and psychological well-being.
To actually succeed, one should study to embrace losses as they arrive and never allow roadblocks to outline who they’re or their stage of success. Success involves those that proceed to soldier on no matter what number of occasions they get knocked down. Didn’t get that promotion or meet your gross sales goal? Who cares.
Properly, maybe your boss would possibly, however don’t fear about that; what you ought to be apprehensive about is just not worrying about these little bumps within the street and being keen to just accept that issues can’t at all times be good or go the best way you hoped in your quest to success. Nonetheless, you possibly can study from the expertise and enhance your strategies.
Be your cheerleader
I’ve labored with sufficient shoppers over time to see the detrimental impacts perfectionism can have on an individual; imagine me, it isn’t fairly. Not solely does the fixed battle to be good take a toll on an individual, nevertheless it additionally begins to slowly seep by way of to their relationships with others, together with these they worth probably the most.
One such particular person was a shopper of mine who labored for a Fortune 500 firm. After years of pushing themselves to the intense to realize what they referred to as the ‘good’ life, all of it got here crashing down, forcing them to re-evaluate their total profession and their unhealthy obsession with ‘perfectionism.’ After being pushed to the brink and having a psychological breakdown, they moved to the nation and opened up slightly enterprise, which by the best way, is prospering!
However better of all, they’re now doing what they love with out the fixed detrimental self-talk they had been accustomed to when attempting to create a façade of an ideal life and chasing the concept of perfectionism.
Let it stream
There may be nothing an individual can’t obtain in life, and we must always all try to do the perfect we will. Nonetheless, in doing so, we should perceive and study to just accept ourselves as is, flawed and all. An individual who achieves nice success is just not one who is ideal however fairly one who’s keen to be imperfect and settle for that errors will probably be made alongside their journey to success. Perfectionism is merely an phantasm that locations unrealistic expectations on an individual. You possibly can solely do issues to the perfect of your skill, and if it doesn’t work, strive once more – that’s what true success is.